Confidence is a crucial thing to have in life whether you are a kid or a grown up. Why? Without confidence you will end up holding back everything that you need to do, such as expressing yourself and etc. One of the greatest gift that parents can give to their children is confidence. As saying goes, confidence is the key to everything. It will somehow predict your luck in the future, because with confidence you will be brave to try everything even though it might challenge you more that you ever imagine.
According to Carl Pickhardt, an author of 15 parenting books and also a psychologist, stresses that a kid who seems to be lacking of confidence will be reluctant to try new or challenging things. This is merely because they are scared of failing or disappointing others.
But worry no more parents, we will give you top sacred tips and advices on how you should do to train your children to be more confident.
Here are 5 things that parents should do to raise a more confident kid
1. Appreciate effort no matter if they win or lose
Some parents only appreciate their kids effort when they win. They thought that if they are acting like that, their kids will try harder to win and put more effort for next time. But, surprisingly when parents do not appreciate the effort, when they lose, it will somehow become a destructive behavior to your kids. They no longer want to try harder after that because they are down and feel as if their effort is not enough even though, who knows, they have tried so hard for that. As parents, please appreciate your kids’ effort no matter the outcome will be.
2. Let them figure out problems by themselves
Everybody knows that parents want to do everything for their kids to make them happy, including solving off their problems. But little did that parents know, solving your kids problems will make them become spoiled and they can’t stand on their own feet in the future, thus making them less confident about themselves. It is okay to let them figure out problems by themselves so that they know what to do and it is a very positive way to help them to grow.
Parental help can prevent confidence derived from self-help and figuring out on the child’s own,
Pickhardt explains.
3. Let them act their age
When a child feels that only performing as well as parents is good enough, that unrealistic standard may discourage effort,
he says.
“Striving to meet advanced age expectations can reduce confidence.”
4. Applaud their courage to try something new
Pickhardt stated that parents should praise their kids for trying new things. Whether it’s for academic or any types of activities such as trying out for travelling together with their basketball team or going on their first roller coaster ride. He suggested that we can praise them even by using simple words like, “You are brave to try this!”
Pickhardt also said that “Comfort comes from sticking to the familiar; courage is required to dare the new and different,”
5. Never criticize their performance
Nothing will discourage your children more than criticizing their efforts. You can give them useful feedback or constructive comments as well as making suggestion to improve their performance but please remember to never tell them that they are doing a bad job. If your kid is scared to fail because they worry you’ll be angry or disappointed, they’ll never try new things.
“More often than not, parental criticism reduces the child’s self-valuing and motivation,” says Pickhardt.
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