Mother, Baby & Kids

5 ways to speak constructively to your kids

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As mothers, our words are powerful. Our words can build our children up, teach them about love, judgement and tolerance. However, sometimes our words can also easily end up tearing them down. Therefore, it is essential to be mindful with the words that we use. So how can you speak constructively, peacefully and meaningfully to your kids?

“I’m sorry”

Mothers are not perfect and we often make mistakes and that’s okay! We are not perfect when it comes to raising a child. As mothers, we should apologize to our child whenever we’ve yelled, scolded or been unfair to them. When we apologize, it shows that we still have that empathetic behaviour towards them.

Ask them questions

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credit: Kids Helpline

Children will always ask you millions of questions. Now, it’s finally your turn to ask them some questions. For instance, when you are outdoors with your child, you can ask them some questions about their surroundings, how they feel, what they see, etc. Through this method, it helps them process their thoughts and feelings more effectively. At the same time, this will also help them build their IQ level as it encourages them to think more.

Recognize their effort

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Whenever we say “good job” to our kids, we tend to boost their confidence. So, why not work on acknowledging their efforts more? By acknowledging the time and effort they have spent into completing a project, it helps them feel more appreciated and valued in your life. With this, it will also help you build a solid and clear narrative for your child and reinforces the positive behaviour that is expected of them.

10-second rule

Transitions can be hard for kids. By adopting the 10-second rule, we can prepare them for the next transition. For example, when playtime is over, you can use the 10-second countdown. By using this method, it will help them to lessen resistance and tantrums. It will also help them accept that it’s time to stop and move on to the next activity.

Let them know that you love them

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Growing up in an Asian country, most parents don’t really know that just by saying “I love you,” is a way of showing your children affection. In fact, children always do little things to show their love for us and it will be really helpful for your child when we say the phrase, “ I love you” to them, especially when they have failed in the things they do. Thus, as mothers, we should really be careful of what we say. Words can hurt a person, even if we don’t to. Our words shape our child to be who we want them to be so be mindful!

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