Empathy and kindness are ingrained in our DNA.
We are naturally predisposed to compassion at a very young age before the world hardens our hearts.
Seeing how adults mistreat us and others eventually takes some of that humanity away.
To make matters worse, the world is unfortunately going further down a more selfish, narcissistic trajectory.
Material gain and personal success matter more than other people’s wellbeing.
Moulding the next generation to be more altruistic and caring is crucial for maintaining peace and harmony in our society.
Here are 5 ways how you can raise a compassionate child.
5 Ways to Raise a Compassionate Child
Be a Role Model
The best way for you to teach your kids about anything is to lead by example.
You’ve probably heard this advice a million times, and for good reason.
Kids learn more about behaviour and moral values from their parents than anyone else. This means you need to first have a stable and happy marriage.
Not a perfect one since that’s impossible, just one where you and your spouse practice mutual communication and understanding.
The quickest and most effective way to impart compassion is to practice it yourself.
With your spouse, your other children, your relatives, etc. Even when you’re not around your child.
In addition, anytime you bring your child to go shopping or run errands, do some good deeds. Help an old lady load her groceries, or cross the street.
Give some pennies to a beggar. Say “thank you and have a nice day” to the cashier.
Surround your life with compassion, and your child will naturally mirror your positive energy.
Read Them Books About Kindness
Sometimes you may not get many opportunities to commit acts of kindness in the world to show your child.
Reading your child books that teach them about how to be caring and compassionate is the next best thing.
Many of these books teach children about empathy and charity. Others show them how to understand people’s facial expressions and body language.
Sometimes your kids may do something unkind and not know how their actions hurt others.
Understanding actions and reactions can give them an idea about how to avoid hurting other people.
Books are an overlooked source for teaching kids about moral values and life lessons.
So go to your local bookshop or library and see if you can put together the recommended list.
It can be a learning experience for both your child’s language and social skills.
Adopt a Furry Friend
Studies have shown that taking care of a pet increases your compassion. It’s general knowledge at this point that pets help adults with their mental health.
After all, “emotional support animals” isn’t just a fancy term that people throw around. These furry companions are trained to comfort those suffering from PTSD and panic attacks.
You may think that your child is too young to experience adult troubles like stress. However, contrary to popular belief, even children suffer from mental health challenges, especially during difficult times.
Having a pet not only alleviates depression, anxiety and stress, it can also instil altruistic traits. Getting a pet for your child can not only help them become more compassionate, but also help them cope during stressful moments.
Pets like cats and puppies are generally weak and helpless creatures. Teaching them how to properly handle and care for a defenceless animal helps cultivate compassion.
Treat Them like Human Beings
A good way to crush the compassion in your child’s heart is to mistreat them. Studies show that a majority of criminals experienced some form of physical and/or psychological abuse early in life.
The trauma of being tormented, usually by one’s own parents, can echo throughout a person’s life well into adulthood. Even if they don’t end up being an outright menace to society, wounded children grow up to be broken adults.
They will eventually pass on their trauma to other people, or worse, their own children. Child abuse is so rampant in Malaysia, so don’t be another statistic.
Lay off the corporal punishments and public shaming. Don’t beat your child into submission. Chances are if they’re acting up, they’re probably copying you.
There are better ways of disciplining your child without being a monster. Or turning your child into one. Another thing to avoid is to hold old mistakes over your kid.
They may have done something naughty in the past, do not treat them like a convict. Trust that your child is capable of being compassionate.
Eliminate Violence in The Home
This of course does not only include physical violence, but also violence on television and video games. Many people have speculated that the media has been responsible for the huge rise in childhood aggression over the past several decades.
However, these are no longer speculations. One study done over a period of 10 years validates this theory.
The study found that continued exposure to violent video games caused children to develop aggressive behaviour later in their late teens and early twenties.
This is not exactly a revelation. Between the killing, maiming, weapons and firearms, it is any wonder why this is the case? So keep any combative, gory video games away from your child.
You should also not let them watch any violent or graphic movies either, even in their pre-teens.
Aggression and compassion generally do not exist within the same genre.
An Act of Kindness, a World of Good
Teaching your kids how to be compassionate human beings is the medicine this world needs.
It may not change things overnight, but one act of kindness can change people’s lives in many ways.
Like a ripple in a pond. Similarly, one act of un-kindness may also snowball into many unwanted consequences.
One thing to note is to always cultivate compassion within yourself first. Your child will likely follow in your altruistic footsteps.
Don’t underestimate how deeply children mirror their parents, for better or for worse.
After all, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. You don’t have to be a good Samaritan every day.
Your child will eventually catch you in a moment of weakness. The worse thing you can do is sweep it under the rug.
Whether it’s an argument with your spouse, or a little scolding, it’s important to acknowledge and apologize for your behaviour.
That said, don’t beat yourself up if you happen to be a little mean or cross on a certain day. We all have our mood swings.
Sometimes we can even be a little unkind to ourselves, even as we shower the world with charity and goodness.
The important thing to remember is that compassion includes being kind to yourself, as much as you are to others.
And I think that’s a valuable lesson to teach any child.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical advice from Motherhood. For any health-related concerns, it is advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or medical practitioner.
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