Society would usually focus on single mothers, but we should not forget that single dads out there don’t have it easy either. They are also playing two important roles for their children—being a mum and a dad. And yet, while there is a lot of research and studies done on single mothers, they may not be so much on single fathers.
That being said, it is important to recognise the hard work and pain that single fathers experience daily. When it comes to daily tasks, single fathers can feel a lot of pressure and face a slew of challenges. One of the best ways to help them is to understand what they are going through.
Let’s look at some of the major challenges that a dad raising kids on his own faces, and what can be done to overcome them.
Disciplining Children as a Single Dad
This is a parenting issue that all parents face, but single fathers may find it more difficult to instil discipline in their children because they lack support from a partner. What makes it even more difficult is that the children may be experiencing emotional stress as a result of their mother’s absence, which may have a negative impact on their behaviour.
Solution: Taking on the role of a single parent entails dozens of new responsibilities. One way to resolve this is by enlisting the help of extended family to serve as an authority figure in the absence of the mother. Is there a woman who can mentor the growing children, particularly the daughters?
Reaching out to professional counsellors and psychologists can come in handy for single fathers to get unbiased support and guidance in dealing with their children. It can also help in dealing with emotional instability in children, which can lead to indiscipline.
Becoming a Mummy Figure
Traditionally, fathers are often seen as the breadwinners for their families. But as single parents, they must also be caregivers. Fathers who have always been busy with their careers may find it difficult to adjust initially and may struggle with taking on the mother’s role. Some might also feel inadequate because they believe their children lack their mummy’s love and attention.
Solution: It’s pertinent to understand that struggling to know where to begin is completely normal because they’ve just experienced a major life change. It’s difficult to lose a partner who should be there as a mother figure for the children, so single dads should not be too hard on themselves.
Sometimes single fathers don’t even have to think about how to be a mother; instead, they must focus on being the best parent to their children. The best thing to do is to always be there for the kids, support them as they grow, and be open about the situation.
Financial Issues
Running a family on one’s own entails not only parenting but also financial management. Single fathers are concerned with making ends meet and providing the best possible life for their children. However, the additional financial burden may limit their time with the children and prevent them from providing proper guidance and supportive attention.
Solution: Yes, money is necessary to continue living and providing the best possible life for children, but so are love and care. Single dads can plan and be creative in generating income so that financial issues do not disrupt the family, but they must always prioritise their children and spend quality time with them. It is also important to remember that financial provision does not determine whether single fathers are good parents.
Lacking a Support System
When it comes to raising children, many single fathers may find it difficult to seek assistance from others, including their fellow single dads. This could be due to social stigmas associated with stereotyping fathers as being less capable of caregiving than single mothers. As a result, single fathers are frequently left to care for their children alone, with no extra assistance and unfair expectations placed on them.
Solution: Society can assume and perceive whatever they want, but for single fathers to succeed, they simply need to learn to ignore the negative externalities. Remember that there are other single fathers out there who are dealing with similar struggles. Single parenting has its ups and downs, so, whenever possible, all fathers who are parenting on their own should look for help.
Balancing Life of Single Dads
Between being busy with work and taking care of the kids, being a single parent is tough no matter for men or women. Single fathers may be overburdened with responsibilities, which can hurt their mental and emotional wellbeing. Most of the time, this may result in issues such as being short-tempered and not giving children the attention they require.
Solution: No single father should neglect himself while raising his children alone. Always set aside some ‘me time’ to ensure one’s physical and mental health. Take a break at least once a week to do something that will help replenish energy, combat stress, and maintain a sense of self. Accept that making mistakes is normal and embrace the journey.
Single Dads Need Support Too
The challenges mentioned above are just mere of what single fathers face as single parents. If you know any, just keep in mind that they, too, need support. It could be any type of assistance, from financial to mental and emotional. Most importantly, be respectful and refrain from passing judgement on how single fathers raise their children.
Shoutout to all super single dads around the world!
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