Being protective is, in fact, one of a parent’s million job descriptions.
It is the effort made to keep children safe from physical and emotional harm.
Of course, providing protection is something that parents consider to some extent, such as providing a safe living environment, quality education, and so on.
There is, however, such a thing as an overprotective parent.
With a highly tunnelled vision to protect their children, overprotective parents tend to obsess over every move that their children make.
They may take into account all possible factors, such as potential physical environments that their children might encounter, and simply strive to prevent any harm from coming to their children.
In other words, even for a low-level risk, an overprotective parent would go beyond what is necessary.
Let us delve deeper into this topic to see how the overprotective attitude can be reduced.
What It Means to Be Overprotective
Overprotective parents are sometimes associated with tiger or helicopter parents, who strive for success and/or perfection.
They cushion the blows that children may take, insulating them from any dangers or obstacles. Not being exposed to the risks and obstacles that would otherwise be necessary for children’s physical, cognitive, emotional, and social development.
They are also often intrusive and highly decisive in all matters concerning the children.
Let’s take homework as an example. A fairly common occurrence that children experience daily.
Parents frequently assist their children with homework to the point where the children can essentially benefit from it—answering a question here and there or explaining a concept.
In contrast, an overprotective parent would do the homework themselves or reveal all answers are out of fear of a poor grade or judgement from others.
Overprotectiveness can result from a variety of factors, including:
- When parents experience parental anxiety or are influenced by excessive media exposure on child-rearing, they tend to overprotect their children.
- Parents who have been through natural or man-made disasters may become overprotective of their children.
- When parents believe their child is vulnerable due to illness or disability, they may become overprotective.
Noting that being overly protective can have negative effects is important.
Therefore, if you feel trapped as an overprotective parent, it is essential to discover strategies for controlling your emotion and maintaining a pleasant relationship with your kids.
Here are some tips to do so.
9 Ways for Parents to Cope from Overprotectiveness
Recognise the Overprotective Issue
Parents frequently try to downplay the drawbacks of their methods of raising their children.
Understanding the signs of an overprotective parent, its causes, and its consequences is necessary to recognise when you have gone too far in being overly protective of your child.
From there, you can better plan your strategy for how to approach the problem.
Distinguish Between Risk and Risky
During play and as they grow, every child is at risk of falling, getting a bump on the head, getting bruises, and getting cuts.
These are important risks for children to face. As an example, consider riding a bike.
Children may trip and fall when they first learn, which is normal. It is perfectly reasonable to allow them to learn to ride a bike.
However, setting them off at night without protective gear—now that is just plain risky.
Practice Safety Measures Together
Recognising dangers and difficulties is important, but learning how to deal with them is even more crucial for parents and kids.
Parents who take precautions can feel secure enough to allow their kids to experience more of life.
Having the chance to practise with their children also gives parents the mental space to trust their kids.
This means trusting them to act or react to risks and obstacles without constantly interfering.
Let Go of the Reigns Gradually
Try to give your children as much freedom as possible.
Allow them to help out in the kitchen by doing the dishes or peeling an onion instead of restricting their access during cooking time.
There are ways to reduce risks and ensure safety, without a doubt.
However, putting up no-entry tapes throughout their lives will only cause them to miss out on the enjoyable aspects of life.
Be There and Be Okay
Overreaction to adversity is one of the signs of an overprotective parent.
You can reduce the possibility of a panic attack domino effect by learning and practising better reactions.
When your child falls, for example, being ‘okay’ allows you to calm down and assess the situation more clearly.
This is much better than becoming enraged and depriving your children of the help and support they require.
Remember, everything will be fine in the end.
Communicate Well
Open and honest discussions about dangers and risks in all aspects of life can help parents loosen up a little.
Good communication is always essential in any situation.
When your children are old enough to understand where your concern is coming from, they may be able to accept and work around the solution together.
It is crucial that these conversations be two-way.
Challenge Yourself
It is certainly easier said than done for many parents, especially overprotective one.
However, taking things one step at a time is an option.
Take them to the playground and let them help around the house.
That homework they have? Your kids will learn more effectively if they get to do it themselves.
This is not meant to challenge only the parents. This also gives the children the necessary autonomy to better understand themselves.
Spend Less Time on Social Media
Social media provides parents with more than just entertainment, but also all of the possible parenting hacks.
Aside from the fact that social media can be addictive, the content you allow on your feed can be detrimental to your self-image as a parent.
Constantly comparing yourself to the ‘perfect image’ of parents online, or worse, comparing your child to another shown on these platforms, may cause you to overprotect yourself to ensure such ‘success’.
Hence, a little less time on social media will go a long way.
Take a Few Deep Breaths
Many people rarely take the time to take deep breaths when they are stressed or in a difficult situation.
When you’re chasing one child after another, or dealing with one worry after another, you get so worked up that you don’t take the time to relax.
This could continue and will undoubtedly influence how you perceive things.
Breathing exercises reduce anxiety and increase blood flow, resulting in a calmer mind to deal with situations.
So, take a deep breath, hold it, and slowly exhale. You’ll be golden.
Be Extremely Wary If You Are an Overprotective Parent
Whatever you do can have an impact on your kids whether directly or indirectly.
According to Psychology Today, children of overprotective parents may develop anxiety, depression, and other mood and adjustment disorders as a result of stress.
Outside of the family circle, these children may become bullying targets or bullies.
Some kids may have narcissistic tendencies and grow up with feelings of entitlement. The list of negative consequences of overprotection continues.
So, please be cautious when overprotecting your children.
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