From the moment our little ones wobble into their first steps, we’re on a mission to give them the brightest future possible.
We memorise every book, every guide, determined to raise resilient, confident, and capable individuals who can take on the world.
While we provide them the calm and comfort of home, we also want them to understand that greatness often emerges from challenges – just like diamonds are forged under intense heat and pressure.
But here’s the real challenge: how do we balance these sky high aspirations with ensuring their happiness, mental health, and overall wellbeing?
This challenge becomes especially apparent during exam seasons, particularly here in Malaysia, where the pressure of high-stakes exams like the SPM (Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia) can feel like the weight of the world on a teenager’s shoulders.
Even as parents, we have sat in the position where academic success is often seen as the golden ticket to a successful future and children are under intense pressure to excel.
The Hidden Struggles of Academic Pressure
It’s easy to assume that academic success is just a matter of hard work and determination.
But for many teens (maybe even for myself at some point), it’s more than that – it’s a constant battle against anxiety, stress, and self-doubt.
In Malaysia itself, research found that 34% of university students experience anxiety, 27.5% face depression, and 18.6% deal with stress.
Similar trends have been seen in other countries.
For example, in Italy, 78.5% of students reported mental health struggles, with 36.1% facing severe distress.
In the UK, more than half of students reported serious levels of depression and anxiety.
As we know it, mental health problems can hurt students’ academic performance and social lives.
Unfortunately, many students don’t seek help with around 60% to 80% of them avoid reaching out for professional support.
For students preparing for major exams like the SPM, the pressure to achieve top grades often stems from not just personal ambition but from the expectations of parents, teachers, and peers.
While this may motivate some children, it can also lead to negative consequences, such as burnout or feelings of inadequacy.
How Academic Stress Affects Children’s Wellbeing
Children who are constantly subjected to high levels of academic pressure may exhibit signs of:
- Emotional Exhaustion: This can manifest as irritability, mood swings, or a lack of enthusiasm about everyday activities.
- Physical Symptoms: Stress often manifests physically, leading to headaches, insomnia, or digestive issues.
- Character Changes: Some children may withdraw socially, avoiding friends and family, while others might become more aggressive or rebellious.
- Declining Academic Performance: While the goal of studying hard is to improve academic results, the reality is that too much stress can actually reduce cognitive function, leading to poor concentration, memory problems, and reduced exam performance.
The more we understand these signs, the better we can support our children in navigating this tough period.
Creating a Safe and Supportive Environment
So, how can we parents help our children thrive during exam seasons without losing sight of their mental and physical wellbeing?
The key lies in creating a supportive environment where balance is the priority. Here is how we can do it:
Your home should be a sanctuary from the pressure of exams.
Encourage your child to speak openly about their worries, frustrations, or even their fears about the upcoming exams.
Sometimes, all they need is someone to listen attentively without judgment.
Let them know that it’s okay to not have all the answers and that they can always lean on you for support.
Prioritise Effort Over Outcome
We often place great emphasis on the outcome as that’s always been the easiest method of measuring success – the grades and the results.
But in reality, the journey and the effort are just as important.
Emphasise that it’s not about being perfect or the best, but about putting in the effort and learning from the process.
Celebrating small wins, like consistent study habits or a clear improvement in their attitude, will help your child build a healthier relationship with learning.
Set Realistic Expectations and Encourage Breaks
Setting realistic goals and helping your child manage their time effectively is critical.
Encourage your child to take regular breaks to recharge, whether that’s through a walk, a hobby, or just watching a short episode of their favorite show.
A study shows that short breaks during study sessions can improve focus and productivity.
It’s also important to adjust your expectations to your child’s unique needs, allowing room for rest and relaxation rather than pushing them to work non-stop.
Additionally, parents should encourage a balanced diet, regular exercise, and adequate sleep during exam preparations.
Students who maintained regular physical activity during stressful periods had better cognitive function and lower levels of anxiety.
A nutritious diet, combined with enough rest, is essential for maintaining focus and improving memory retention.
Be Their Role Model
The way we handle stress as parents will directly impact how our children learn to cope.
By demonstrating healthy stress management techniques, like staying calm under pressure, taking time to relax, or talking things through with others, you are teaching your children to approach challenges with resilience and composure.
Nurturing Academic Success and Emotional Resilience
For any parent, it is understandable that balancing academic excellence with emotional wellbeing may feel like an impossible task.
But it doesn’t have to be.
The world today can be a competitive place, and we don’t want our children to be left behind.
However, we also don’t want them to burn out, feel inadequate, or lose their sense of self-worth in the process.
At the end of the day, as much as it want the best results on their report card, we also want them to grow into confident and resilient adults
They may face challenges and setbacks, but with the right support system in place, they will grow into well-rounded individuals who are not just capable of succeeding academically, but also emotionally equipped to thrive in the world.
By focusing on the overall wellbeing of our children, especially during high-stress times like exam season, we can ensure they grow into well-rounded individuals who not only succeed academically but also develop the necessaries to tackle life’s challenges.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical advice from Motherhood. For any health-related concerns, it is advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or medical practitioner.
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