It’s remarkable how motherhood changes our lives (and our personal philosophies).
But for the queen of decluttering herself, Marie Kondo, having a third child has also allowed her to give birth to an entirely new approach when enforcing domestic perfection.
Now, what ‘spark’s joy’ for her no longer revolves around neatly arranged pillows, or pristine floating shelves. Instead, it’s on how she spends her time doing what she loves.
The 38-year-old shot to fame back in 2011 when her book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up became an overnight bestseller.
She has since appeared in dozens of talk shows and interviews and even starred in her own Netflix special, Sparking Joy with Marie Kondo.
Her popularity also paved the way for the rise of her own consultancy empire called KonMari, specialising in professional organising and tidying, which she co-founded with husband, Kawahara Takumi.
Marie’s patented method of tidying up, KonMari, takes a sacred, almost animistic approach to how you deal with the physical objects in your home (especially sentimental ones). Treating each item as if it had a living soul.
Instead of asking yourself practical questions like ‘Will I still be using this in 2 years’, the KonMari method involves an emotional process.
It involves asking the question, ‘Does this spark joy?’ and experiencing the answer in your heart.
If it does not, then thank the item for its service and let it go. This is how you determine what you love and most importantly, what you need.
However, she stresses that KonMari isn’t about perfectionism or even about minimalism but about self-love.
Since becoming a mother for the third time, she has made a few changes to this philosophy.
The Joy of Being
In a Washington Post story, she confesses that the perpetual messiness of motherhood has made her reassess her stance on tidiness.
‘Not everyone can achieve the spotless, home of their dreams’, she says.
Armed with this new revelation, Marie turns her gift for home organising into a quest for happiness.
Her latest book, Marie Kondo’s Kurashi at Home: How to Organize Your Space and Achieve Your Ideal Life, asks readers to turn the Konmari concept on its head.
Instead of organising your life around your home, organise your home around your life.
Inspired by the idea of kurashi, loosely translated as ‘way of life’, Marie proposes,
‘Embrace what you love about your life and then reflect it in your home, activities, and relationships, like creating a calm nook for working, scheduling weekly get-togethers with family or friends, or having relaxing nighttime rituals that promote a restful sleep.’
Her signature tagline has evolved beyond the simple but superficial activity of tidying up to truly experiencing the joys of being.
From decluttering your home to decluttering your life.
If you’ve always looked to your home to spark joy, now it’s time to look inside and spark joy from within, regardless of the chaos around you.
The End of KonMari?
Marie may have relaxed her view on tidiness, but that doesn’t mean she’s given up on her immaculate aesthetic.
In fact, she still urges people to continue to apply her KonMari method when cleaning out your clutter. As well as when you declutter your life.
Now when you hear ‘Does this spark joy?’, it’s no longer just about taking apart your wardrobe and going through each article of clothing to see if it invokes a rush of happiness.
It’s about asking the same question about your habits and your routines, your dreams and aspirations, your tasks and responsibilities.
Sure, organising clothes and dealing with doom piles is still the part and parcel of motherhood.
But time with loved ones and creative pursuits are equally as important for your emotional wellbeing.
For instance, when she’s not busy cleaning up after her kids, Marie herself enjoys scrapbooking, cooking, gardening, and of course some much-needed self-care. Hobbies that she still makes time for even with a family to feed and an empire to run.
Practice KonMari with Your Kids
Now comes the juicy part, because Marie also gives us the goods on how to practice tidiness with your children.
These includes tips for mums on how to ensure a (somewhat) spotless house with kids running around.
If Marie can do it as a mother of three, so can you!
Her four principles of when tidying with kids is:
- Narrate as You Tidy
- Make Tidying Playful
- Give Everything a Home
- Respect Spatial Limitations
In an Instagram post, she says ‘it’s never too late to teach your kids about the joys of tidiness’.
But this can be challenging because what ‘sparks joy’ for your kids may also be the thing that puts your teeth on edge.
So, Marie’s trick is to dedicate a space for your kid’s belongings, preferably somewhere out of sight.
When it comes to baby or children’s clothes, she recommends using labelled boxes instead of dressers to ensure convenience and neatness.
When tidying kid’s toys, it helps to sort everything by category.
But above all, always use tidying as a reason to bond so you never waste a precious second with your kids. And remember to spend as much time as you can with them.
Because in the words of Marie Kondo herself,
‘Nothing sparks joy like motherhood,’
And we couldn’t agree more.
For more insightful stories and fun recipes, stay tuned to Motherhood Story!