15 Common Misconceptions About Motherhood Debunked

Medically Reviewed by: Dr Somaskandar Sivasuntharam - MBBS (Mang), Dip Rep Med (Mal), M Med (O&G)(Mal), MR Med (Aust), AM (with special interest in Reproductive Medicine), Obstetrics & Gynaecology (O&G), Gleneagles Hospital Penang There is no shortage of information when it comes to what every woman must know about motherhood today. But couple an overload of information with baseless findings or customs and superstition, you may easily fall victim to misinformation. Malaysian mothers are no stranger to being on the receiving end of unsolicited or baseless advice, whether it's about pre or postnatal care or how they choose to raise their children. You may have even heard, for example, that getting your COVID-19 vaccine today may harm your baby—which is needless to say, far from true. Or even not to shower at all after birth. So then comes the question: What else were you told to do that's actually unnecessary? Is breastfeeding supposed to be painless? Can you start exercising during pregnancy? Does your belly shape explain your baby's gender? Today, we'll address motherhood's most common concerns and myths you may have very well heard of yourself! 15 Most Common Concerns About Motherhood Debunked #1 Eat for one, not two! Image credit: Canva You may have been chided before about your food consumption with concerns about whether or not your little one is getting enough nutrients. Because, after all, you should be 'eating for two.' The fact is, that's a myth that can very well be damaging to mothers and many experts have been generous with timely reminders. Weight gain during pregnancy is necessary but just enough to replenish and supply extra nutrients for the mummy and baby. Too much weight gain or loss will lead to health complications for both you and the baby. So, be sure to stick to a healthy diet and nutrition plan with consultation from your doctor! #2 Sleeplessness is part of the deal—for now! Image credit: Canva Perhaps one of the most daunting parts of motherhood is the earliest stage: you're finally home with your little one and you're discovering they aren't particularly fond of sleep! The new reality is that it's going to be a while until you’re back to the good ol' days of uninterrupted sleep (or any sleep at all, really). Because while your newborn needs at least 17 hours of sleep a day, it’s actually rare for them to fall into a deep sleep. Their first few months with you entail a lot of figuring out meal, nap and sleep times that best accommodate their needs. But it certainly won’t take long until you eventually fall into a routine or habit that works best for the little one! #3 Bonding with your child takes time Image credit: Canva To some parents, the bond between them and their newborn can be instantaneous and it may stress out others who have yet to relate. So, you might have felt an immediate attachment at their first kick, or when you first laid eyes on them. Sometimes, it simply takes time because, well, cultivating any relationship involves getting to know a person and understanding them. In the case of your newborn, it may all fall into place weeks or months after getting to understand their needs. Bear in mind that bonding is not a natural process and it is one that grows over time! #4 After-birth ‘Mummy Brain’ Is Normal Image credit: Canva 'Mummy brain' is known colloquially as brain fog, or moments of forgetfulness some mothers tend to experience after birth. And while some may crack jokes about it, it's very much real and medically proven. Believe it or not, a woman's brain undergoes changes during and after pregnancy—and it may be for the better as well. When pregnant, grey matter in the brain tends to decrease. The brain does get smaller but it also grows more efficient and helps the mother form a healthier attachment to their baby. #5 Breastfeeding can be hard Image credit: Canva It can be hard and it's not always painless. Breastfeeding can either be a wonderful journey, or a painful one to some. Either way, it's a skill that definitely takes time to harness, taking into consideration the latching, positioning and even the array of supplies to choose from. Sometimes as the little one latches on one side of the beast, the other starts leaking out milk droplets. If you're a new mummy in search of tips to ease your breastfeeding journey, visit this article for detailed shares by experienced mummies we interviewed! # 6 Your belly shape does not determine the baby's gender Image credit: Canva Now, this is a widely popular belief. We've heard how the size of a woman's belly indicates the baby's gender—which is scientifically untrue. Whether you have a high or low belly, pointed or wide, big or small, does not indicate the sex of your baby. What influences the shape of your belly instead lies in three important facts: Your muscular structure—including the elasticity of your abdominal wall The baby's foetal position in the belly The occurrence of diastasis recti #7 Not every pregnancy results in Postpartum Depression Image credit: Canva Postpartum depression is a common reason for many women to fear motherhood, and rightly so. It can happen days, weeks or months after the birth of your newborn but it's also temporary. Although vastly different from baby blues, postpartum depression can be a serious condition but one important fact to keep in mind is that it's highly treatable. It's also unlikely for it to recur in your following pregnancies. #8 The chances of SIDS are low Image credit: Canva We at Motherhood once had a chat with an expert pertaining to the occurrence of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) among infants today. And much like many other experts presently, Dr Joann agrees that chances of your little one catching SIDS are much lower now compared to then. But that doesn't mean zero risks. Today, the chances of a baby dying from SIDS are 2-6 deaths in 1000. We cannot prevent the occurrence of SIDS, but according to Dr. Joann, we can definitely do is mitigate and reduce the risks by: Making sure your baby sleeps on their back, not belly Avoiding co-sleeping on the same bed with a baby younger than 1-year-old Ensuring the baby's sleeping environment is hazard-free Avoiding exposure to cigarette smoke during and after pregnancy Attending good antenatal check-ups for premature, over, or underweight babies #9 You can still breastfeed when sick You may worry about breastfeeding when you or the baby are sick but it's actually safe! Breast Milk contains antibodies that actually help the baby to fight common illnesses. It's highly unlikely for your baby to catch your cold or stomach bug through breastfeeding. As a matter of fact, it's also safe for mothers to continue with breast milk when they have COVID-19 too. #10 You can still have that cup of coffee (or tea)! Image credit: Canva Have you been chided from drinking that cup of coffee during pregnancy, mummy? If you've had people telling you to avoid caffeine altogether, they may only be partially right. It's safe to consume caffeine during pregnancy but within limited consumption. Just ensure not to consume more than 200mg of caffeine per day. The key lies in moderation! #11 Exercising during pregnancy doesn't cause premature labour Image credit: Canva Despite what you've heard, exercising and physical activities are highly encouraged throughout all three trimesters of your pregnancy. Keeping fit and active not only improves your overall pregnancy journey, but also helps with a smoother labour experience. There are workouts and activities you should avoid though. These include: Running (unless your doctor certifies it's safe) Contact sports High-intensity training or exercises Scuba diving High altitude activities Other than that, don't forget your warm-ups and to cool down after every workout. Also, never exert yourself and always consult your doctor! #12 Frequent nursing won't lead to childhood obesity Image credit: Canva If your little one has been a big fan of breastfeeding or mealtimes in general, it's really not a cause of concern. This is especially so if you're worried about childhood obesity. As a matter of fact, breastfeeding has actually been shown to decrease the likelihood of childhood obesity. In this study, it was proven that those breastfed between 3 to 7 months displayed decreased risks of obesity! #13 Epidurals are not harmful Image credit: Canva Here's an old wife's tale still staunch within our community. Some people believe that epidurals might harm the mother and baby; that they may cause paralysis and life-long back pains, or increase the risks of a C-section delivery. The reality is far from that. Cases of harm and extreme side effects are extremely rare. Epidurals in no way harm your labour experience nor does it have permanently damaging effects on women. #14 Fish is a nutritious addition to your confinement diet! Image credit: Canva Despite what you may hear about fish, you may actually consume them during and post-pregnancy! Some may be better minimised, and there are definitely those to avoid. For example, raw or semi-cooked fish which may contain parasites. You may find the easiest confinement fish recipes here! #15 Motherhood doesn't need to always be self-sacrificing! Image credit: Canva One of the most common fears of motherhood is the thought of sacrificing the things that made you, you. Motherhood is addled with an onslaught of hormones and emotional roller-coasters, amidst a tirade of changes to life as you know it. On one hand, it does ring true. Bringing a little human half to the world bears a life-long commitment and responsibility. And there is no such thing as giving your kids a pause, but one skill most mothers come to master is the art of multitasking. In between sorting out newfound priorities, you'll eventually come to learn the best form of self-care. Whether it's a long shower, a walk in the park or a session of shopping! You've got this, mummies! Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical advice from Motherhood. For any health-related concerns, it is advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or medical practitioner. For more insightful stories and fun recipes, stay tuned to Motherhood Story!

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