No More Phones! The Importance of Dining Table Mannerism for Your Children

Particularly in Asian culture, dining table mannerism plays an important role in our daily lives. Therefore, being born in a Chinese family in Malaysia, I was taught about dining table mannerism since young. If my siblings and I did not follow any of the rules, both my parents would sternly reprimand us. Looking back into those days, I am now very glad that my parents taught me on dining table mannerism as I find it lacking in today’s society, especially in children nowadays. My heart sank every time when I was having meals in eateries and restaurants. Family members, friends or colleagues sat around the dining table with their eyes locking onto their phones. No face-to-face interaction, everyone was busy playing with their phones. Toddlers and children were the most saddening scenarios. To make them sit still and finish their meals, parents had to put their smartphones in front of their children and let them watch animation videos while they were eating. Children would scream out of their lungs if their parents got rid of their smartphones. Not only for little children, but I had also seen upper primary school children setting up their smartphones for video watching while having their meals. It was as if they were so busy that they ought to watch the videos at that moment. Why Dining Table Mannerism? Don’t we need to reflect on how we are handling dining table mannerism with ourselves and children now? We understand that it is quick when you use smartphones to get your children to stay still on the dining table. However, this is not a matter of choosing a quick but temporary solution, it involves us as parents to train our children in dining table mannerism. When your children learn up the etiquette on the dining table, they will act politely and appropriately. Especially when the elders are around, your children’s good table manners will help to ensure that everyone is comfortable during the meals. When you are teaching your children about the dining table etiquette, you are actually teaching them more about the concept of one thing at a time. As humans, our brains are not built to multitask at one time. As it appears to be multitasking, you are just switching between tasks. So, you can’t focus on eating when your attention is wholly on your phone screen. So, should we start on what you need to train in your children while having meals on the dining table? 4 Effective Rules Set for Pleasing Dining Table Mannerism Rule 1: Leave Your Phone Far Away From the Dining Table Image credit to Pixabay Whether it is having meals at home or at the eateries, we need to set this primary rule. Nobody, including you as parents, can put and look at their phones on the dining table. We must instil the concept that a dining table is a place where everyone eats and interacts face-to-face for better relationships. Remember, nothing is as urgent and important as your family members. You need to be present in every interaction on the dining table. As for eating with toddlers, we need to first stay firm about having meals on the dining table. Set them sitting around the dining table and make sure they finish their meals before they can move around or go to their toy areas. Most importantly, never give in to smartphone to persuade your toddlers to sit still for eating. It is challenging at the beginning, but you need to persist to get them focused while eating. You will be glad that you have taught your children a valuable lesson that benefits them for a lifetime. Rule 2: Take Only the Amount of Food You Can Clean Off Your Plates Image credit to Unsplash Your children need to learn the amount of food they can finish per meal. Instead of scooping the dishes for them, let them try to decide how much they want to have on their plates. Here’s a tip: you can tell your children to get a little for every dish first. If they feel like they are not full yet, they can always add on any dishes they like. What if your children could not finish what they have taken? Instead of scolding them on the spot, guide them to understand how much they afford to finish per meal. Try to help out your children to finish what’s on their plates and with several practice, you will see your children be able to make decision for their meals. Rule 3: Leave the Dining Table Sparkling Clean After Your Meals Image credit to Unsplash It is essential to educate our children to clean the dining table after they have finished having their meals. They should collect the leftover bones or food residue on their plates and help out to wipe the dining table if you are having meals at home. How about having meals at the eateries or restaurants? They should also collect the food residues on their plates and also leave any used paper towels on their plates too. My sister once made me learnt a huge lesson on dining table etiquette. After working as a part-time waitress in a restaurant, my sister would always make sure that no used paper towels were left on the dining table. If possible, she would stack up the plates so that it is easier for the waiters to collect them. Since our little action could bring convenience to the others, why don’t we get our children to do the same too? By getting our children to clean the dining table after their meals, we are teaching them about responsibility and consideration. Rule 4: Follow Basic Dining Table Etiquette Image credit to Unsplash Besides following the rules above, we should educate our children on some key dining table etiquette such as waiting for the elders to eat first. You can start practising at home by asking your children to wait until you say ‘Let’s eat’ or until you start getting dishes with your eating utensils. With this, your children will learn to wait for their turns and to show love and affection for their elders. Moreover, your children should really learn to chew their food with their mouth closed. This is to prevent them from spitting out food during the process. As hygiene is essential especially during the COVID-19 pandemic, make sure your children wash their hands before and after their meals. See Your Children Having Meals with Proper Dining Table Etiquettes Together, we can train our children to unlearn what not to do on the dining table and relearn the proper dining table etiquette. What your children truly need is not a smartphone to stay still while eating; they need your constant care and attention. Be their role model starting from today, put down and have a happy meal with your loved ones.

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