How to Avoid Raising Entitled Kids - November 2024

We are often misled with the notion that wealthy parents raise spoiled kids, and to a certain extent this may be true, But we see entitled behaviour in individuals from all socioeconomic backgrounds. That’s without taking into account the various hereditary traits that may encourage entitled behaviour. Narcissism for instance, one of the cornerstones of entitled behaviour, is often seen as a result of both genetic and environmental factors. So, is entitlement a symptom of nature or nurture? If you have narcissistic parents, does that mean you’re automatically doomed to become entitled from birth? Perhaps, perhaps not. Science has shown us that nurture can override even the most primitive of human predilections. Here are 6 things parents do that raise entitled kids that you should avoid. 6 Things Parents Do That Inadvertently Raise Entitled Kids Letting Them Win All the Time Life is often compared to a game; you win some, you lose some. Entitled children will always feel like they deserve to win, even though they don’t. You need to make your child understand that they can’t always get what they want, when they want it. This can range from toys, to competitions, to even friends. If you give in too early and too often to your child’s demands, they may become spoiled overtime. Aside from letting your child pick and choose their own battles, you should also teach them to accept defeat with grace. Swooping In To Save the Day As parents, we can sometimes be violently protective of our child. We fight their battles, solve their problems, and shelter them from accountability. Growing up and learning new things can be hard, but you can’t expect to be doing everything for your child. When the going gets tough, have faith that they can pull themselves out of the rubble. Children are smarter and more resilient than you think. But if you intervene too often when things get too hard, you risk depriving your child of all the learning opportunities that come their way. Catering to Their Every Heart’s Desire No one’s shaming you for having a fat pay cheque, that’s something you’ve worked hard on and deserve. But you should not extend the same luxury to your kids. Wealth and entitlement often go hand in hand, that’s just how the world works. People who have money can buy their way out of any situation, but that’s not something you want to teach your kids. Rich parents naturally want their kids to have the best life possible, with more opportunities and brighter prospects. But one way to raise a complete monster is to give them everything they want without working for it. I am not suggesting you deprive your child of basic needs or commodities, but learn to set some boundaries. Teach your child that they have to earn their wealth, not expect it to come from other people. Not Giving Them Enough Responsibilities This does not merely include things like household chores, but other facets that nourish and support the family unit. Contrary to popular belief, young children are never too young to contribute to their family in meaningful ways. Even something simple as being able to take care of themselves lessens some of the workload that comes with being a parent. Your child should ideally learn to pick up after themselves. Putting away their toys, washing their dishes, even folding their own clothes. They don’t even have to vacuum the house every month. Once your child has earned their sea legs, you can slowly start giving them responsibilities, whether that’s cleaning the table after every meal, or taking the rubbish out every week. This exercise increases their humility, which is a potent antidote to entitlement. Giving Them Too Much Attention Entitled people often have an inflated perception of themselves. Feeding your child’s ego too much by making them the centre of your universe will naturally make them feel as if the world literally revolves around them. It’s a hard hitting fact when adults realize they’re not special, but it’s a lesson that you have to teach your child. The world doesn’t owe any of us anything; it is up to us to earn our privileges and luxuries and work hard for them. So stop coddling your child and let them have some identity and independence away from you. Being Entitled Yourself Let’s be honest, many of us think we deserve special treatment that goes beyond common courtesy. Whether that’s from our spouse, our co-workers or even from strangers. This behaviour naturally comes out during a long queue, or a traffic jam, or when your favourite product is sold-out at the grocery store. Hitting a little too close to home, isn’t it? That’s not to mention all the classist, racist, sexist undertones that saturate our society, with certain majority groups thinking they “deserve” certain things simply because of their social status, the colour of their skin or their gender. Don’t add to the entitlement epidemic by showing your kids you deserve something without working for it. It’s an ugly thing to watch. Ending the entitlement epidemic Young kids are so often accused of being entitled and privileged. But if anyone’s to blame, it would be the previous generation who raised them. Hereditary wealth can lend an unfair advantage to many people, giving them an edge in life. If you come from an affluent family, or have amassed your own fortune throughout the years, it’s ok to live a comfortable life. But just know that when wealth is involved, entitlement is surely not far behind. The trick is to know how to raise a child without spoiling them when you definitely know that you can afford to. But with these tips, at least you’ll know what NOT to do. Hopefully, instead of an entitled child who wants everything served on a silver platter, you’ll raise a little philanthropist who is always willing to bequeath their fortune for a good cause. Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical advice from Motherhood. For any health-related concerns, it is advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or medical practitioner. For more insightful stories and fun recipes, stay tuned to Motherhood Story!

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